Ski trip to Big Bear around the corner..

This weekend we hunted for some ski pants and jacket for me for our Ski Date on the 20th at Big Bear. We did not have much luck though. I tried on Women's smalls, and women's large, then went to men's small, but ran into the same problem with each brand. When the pant fit covered my length, it over compensated in width. But, I may have found someone I can borrow a ski jacket from. So all I will need are some pants. My ski clothes are in a closet in Breckenridge, Colorado unfortunately. And I don't ski a whole lot. It's one of those sports I enjoy at the end of the ski run, where I am glad I took the plunge despite my fear of tumbling down a snowy mountain, breaking every bone in my body.

Downhill skiing scares the crap out of me most when I am standing on two skis at the top of a run, and I cannot see where the run goes. That says to me there's a drop off and you better say your prayers Kiki. Somewhere at the top, I'm relying on what I know to maneuver down to civilization, to hot coco and warm interiors. Why do I keep going back to the top? This whole thing is a metaphor for some aspect of my life I am sure. I keep getting on the chair lift and going up again because at some point, I get the hang of it, and I'm glad I tried. I like it. Getting to the "I like it" place takes some time though. I first panic a bit while looking at the unknowns of this great white mountain slope. I soon remember what I was taught on the bunny slopes, and as long as I follow those instructions, I am on my way down in one piece (hopefully). And all those instructions, they work.. I have fun at it.. 'Til I fall and twist a limb a direction it should not go, but still, along the way, downhill skiing became exhilarating. I was flying down this mountain, and had control of my direction, my speed, and felt on top of the world. Without fail, every ski run begins with a load of apprehension toward my ability to keep myself safe, and alive through the run down the mountain.

So... we're going skiing again, and again I'm going to be flippin' out in my head thinking about the journey down, those fears of falling and crashing, ahead of me. Intimidated by the more experienced skiers zipping by, doing crazy stunts, while I just focus on what I know works. And, I guess I keep going because I'll feel like I missed out if I don't go for it. Jan 20th we'll be at Big Bear.. oh boy.